Really I am.
It's not like I am re-living the days with my son, who is all grown up and doesn't call me back a lot of the time in spite of my cheery but desperate messages.
Why not at all.
But I have to tell you I am amazed. Because Jen is an achiever. A person who gets things done. Really kind of a perfectionist. And she is just so easygoing with this nephew of mine. She is just helping him be who he is.
And that makes me so proud.
She is O.K. with how he wrinkles his forehead if you are a new person or if he is trying to figure something out. If he doesn't want to stand up. Who cares. He is an EXCELLENT crawler! She is the head cheerleader of Team Little Prince!
Here is what is different about that son of hers and the one I had a bit too young.
She knows he is a miracle.
She knows that he is perfect.
I think I was too busy juggling the demands of four children to appreciate my miracle.
But now I do. Only he is 20 years old and he thinks it is a bit cheesy that I hang on his every word. That I agonize over what to put under the Christmas tree for him. That I wish I understood him better when he was a toddler chasing toads and ignoring his friends.
What's done is done.
But I remember a few years ago, at Thanksgiving dinner, we all had to say what we really knew for sure, and he said: " I always knew my momma loved me."
So I guess I did O.K.
But if I could go back, older and wiser, and tell the boy that if you are different, you are still perfect in every way, that would be bliss.
So, GO JEN! One chance. You are doing a great job. He is perfect because he YOURS.
From now until he is all grown up, I'll be cheering you on.